WARNING...THE FOLLOWING BLOG MAY BE OFFENSIVE (BUT IT REALLY SHOULDN'T BE, IF YOU READ THIS, YOU HOPEFULLY WILL UNDERSTAND)...CONTINUE AT YOUR OWN RISK...
I was on my way to the golf course this morning and I noticed that my left nostril was experiencing some blockage. Not wanting to hamper my game with an oxygen flow issue, I did a clean swipe with my index finger and gave a little flick out of the window. Then I got to thinking if someone was driving by me and saw me do that they might have been disgusted. After pondering that imaginary scenario for a bit, I began to think about other "socially unacceptable" behaviors; burping, farting, talking about poop (what a funny word), etc.
What's the big deal about these things. WE ALL DO IT! Come on now! If you are shaking your head you are in DENIAL! I burp. I FART! I POOP!! And YES I PICK MY NOSE!!!
So, all of you in denial or just purely disgusted, embrace your farts! Let that burp ring free. If you drop a spectacular "hot one", don't be afraid to tell someone about it, and don't leave out those dirty details! Turn these "unacceptable behaviors" into what they really are, natural, everyday, important parts of all of our lives. I won't be upset if you drive by and that booger you just flicked out the window, lands on my windshield. I will celebrate your independence by gleefully streaking it across my windshield with the wipers. Embrace humanity for the burping, farting, pooping, booger flicking people that we really are!!
Oh by the way, I did about an hour on the elliptical today instead of running. A was drenched in sweat by the end, so I suppose that'll have to do for today's workout. Still craving that run, but am holding off, per advice.
2 months ago
One of the really cool things about runnning an ultra is you will sometimes be farting burping and blowing snot rockets at the same time.
ReplyDeleteYou're completely correct, OFGR. As a runner, you have to learn to get over the embarrassing body functions. Of course, this is coming from a girl who is a champion snot rocketer, and who once entertained a crowd near the finish line of a 5K by vomiting up the Red Bull and Dannon Key Lime Yogurt she had foolishly eaten right before the race. And though I won't make THAT mistake ever again, I have learned to throw up while keeping my feet moving!
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